I am a competitive person. My husband will not work out with me because he knows if he runs a mile, I will have to run two. I like to win and have been known to make the silliest of things somehow competitive. I’ve struggled with the need to fit in with the designer clothes of the moment, being accepted into the right sorority in college, and generally being the person that others will know will get the job done.
My competitive streak created an unhealthy level of perfectionism and often anxiety. I always wanted to be the best and I often was but it came at a price. I spent an enormous amount of energy attempting to accomplish everything but I am not so sure I enjoyed the process or the journey. In the past I would typically just look to the next activity. I continue to witness competition in many that I know in regards to children’s birthday parties, owning the right car and being invited to the right events. The events of the past few years have made me realize that the struggle of fitting in can be damaging. It’s ok if your clothes come from Target, your car is several years old and your vacation consists of sitting in your backyard.
There is such a thing as healthy competition. Competition can improve each of us. We need competition to be motivated and it is helpful to have goals to reach. It is also always nice to feel that hard work has paid off and be recognized as a sales leader or help your team win the game. Without competition, perhaps little would be accomplished. However, life in general is not a competition.
Sarah is a graphic designer and photographer from North Carolina who established her blog as a way to share her photography and some pieces of her personal life. As we were discussing our blogs, she made the comment that she felt at times there is a competitiveness to the blogging world. Of course there are professional bloggers but there are also the ameatur bloggers who regularly seek sponsored posts, post daily and are a constant social media presence. There are equally a number of fantastic bloggers that share incredible content full of inspiration and have no sponsored posts ( This isn’t to say that big name bloggers don’t publish fantastic posts). However, it can be difficult to not be concerned with number of readers, connections with sponsors and who has better photography. By focusing upon these topics, quantity can overtake content.
Sarah is a fantastic photographer and shares beautiful views of her state from horse riding weekends to state park visits. I am looking forward to visiting some of the places she suggested when we travel to North Carolina in November. We both also discussed the difficulty of finding time to work full time and be consistent with our blogs. I reminded her that life is meant to be lived and that is more important than making sure there is a blog post being written.
It helped me to connect with Sarah and to reevaluate what I want from this space. Blogging has become a serious hobby for me that is connected to my professional life. There are days when I desire more readers, stronger connections and to expand this space. However, at the same time , I want to live my life and that often includes stepping away. I’m proud of my friends who are “more successful” bloggers but I am also proud of what I am accomplishing. I’ve chosen to not be competitive in this area because I want to practice self care and be honest about life.
I’m so glad I took the opportunity to connect with Solidarity Sisters and encourage readers to take the time to sign up for the November connection. Life is about connecting! I”m connecting with the Solidarity Sisters link-up and Emily’s Grateful Heart Monday.