Individuals often hurt us, make us feel emotions we don’t know what to do with and it can be confusing with how to handle the emotions in a healthy manner. Writing a letter is a journal technique which can be therapeutic as it enables you to express your feelings without being judged or hurting the other person. After writing the letter it is possible there is no need to do anything else.
I do have to warn about the use of writing a good-bye letter to a loved one who is deceased. Many clients have come into my office reporting that well meaning friends have told them to write a good-bye letter only a few weeks after a death. The reality is, we can continue writing letters to individuals for as long as we need. Unless the individual is feeling the need to write a “good-bye” letter, there is no need to attempt that step. This is a closure technique that should only be attempted when ready.
I have written letters to my Mom over the past year, along with prayers and have no doubt that I will continue to write as I need. I’m discussing letters because the prompt for today’s Write or Die Wednesday with Mia and Vashelle made me think of my Dad. He died when I was 10 and over the years I have never written a letter to him.
The official prompt for today is:
If you could have a one-hour coffee date with anyone in the world (or on the other side), who would it be? Why? What would you talk about?
At first I thought I would love to meet with Oprah or some other celebrity. I then realized there are many things I do not know about my Dad. When one loses a parent at a young age, you aren’t supposed to know them as anything other than your parent. I would love to get to know him as a person.
The world of coffee alone is totally different from when he was alive. Thus, I would have to make sure the changes in the world were not the main topic of conversation. However, I would love to show him what computers look like now and the capability of cell phones.I would want to know what his favorite music was. What was his favorite color? Where did he live when he was a student at the University of Kentucky? Have I become what he hoped for me? As I think about it, simply being in his presence as grown woman would be amazing.
Who would you want to have coffee with? Are there letters you need to write and not send? Take time today to join this wonderful link-up.